Dear Abby – II

Abigail Van Buren

Abigail Van Buren

Dear Abby,
Do you think it would be all right if I gave my doctor a little gift? I tried for years to get pregnant and couldn’t and he finally did it.

Dear Abby,
My mother is mean and short-tempered. I think she is going through her mental pause.

Dear Abby,
You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all interest in sex years ago and he IS a doctor.

Dear Abby,
My boyfriend is going to be twenty years old next month. I’d like to give him something nice for his birthday. What do you think he’d like?
Regards, Carol

Dear Carol,
Never mind what he’d like. Give him a tie.

Dear Abby,
Our son was married in January. Five months later his wife had a ten-pound baby girl. They said the baby was premature. Tell me, can a baby this big be that early?
Thanks, Wondering

Dear Wondering,
The baby was on time, the wedding was late. Forget it.

Dear Abby,
I know boys will be boys, but my boy is seventy-three and he’s still chasing women. Any suggestions?
Help, Annie

Dear Annie,
Don’t worry. My dog has been chasing cars for years, but if he ever caught one, he wouldn’t know what to do with it.

Dear Abby,
I have always wanted to have my family history traced, but I can’t afford to spend a lot of money to do it. Any suggestions?
Regards, Sam

Dear Sam,
Yes. Run for public office.

Dear Abby,
What inspires you most to write?

Dear Ted,
The Bureau of Internal Revenue.

Dear Abby,
I am forty-four years old and I would like to meet a man my age with no bad habits.
Regards, Rose

Dear Rose,
So would I.

Dear Abby,
What’s the difference between a wife and a mistress?

Dear Bess,
Night and Day!

Credit: Dear Abby is the name of the advice column founded in 1956 by Pauline Philips under the pen name “Abigail Van Buren” and carried on today by her daughter, Jeanne Phillips. Most of these are from the compendium “The Best Of Dear Abby“. More of these were published last week..

Related: Dear Abby – 1

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