MyLifeYoga

Questioner: Some yogis say that one must renounce this world and go off into secluded jungles if one wishes to find the truth.

Sri Ramana Maharshi: The life of action need not be renounced. If you meditate for an hour or two every day you can then carry on with your duties. If you meditate in the right manner then the current of mind induced will continue to flow even in the midst of your work. It is as though there were two ways of expressing the same idea; the same line which you take in meditation will be expressed in your activities.

Questioner: What will be the result of doing that?

Sri Ramana Maharshi: As you go on you will find that your attitude towards people, events and objects gradually changes. Your actions will tend to follow your meditations of their own accord.

Questioner: Then you do not agree with these yogis?

Sri Ramana Maharshi: A man should surrender the personal selfishness which binds him to this world. Giving up the false self is the true renunciation.

Credit: This is from “Be As You Are” By Ramana Maharshi, Edited by David Godman.

Related: Renunciation Is Not The Same As Fleeing

We consider ourselves as “rational” or at least “reasonable” creatures. But this wonderful talk lays bare our “cognitive limitations” that make our decision making suspect. The moral of the story is that if we are not rational as we think we should recognize our limitations and work on building systems that keep us from driving ourselves into ditches.

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I have often been asked the question by parents as to what to say to kids as they struggle to make sense of their life. Parents often feel that they are walking on eggshells. Their kids have made a major detour because of their drug and alcohol use. They may be struggling to get their life back on track, or simply still in the midst of their drug use.

Parents so often hope that they will say the golden words that will make a difference.

We’ve been told so often that there is nothing that we can do. We need to detach and let go. There may come a time when that is all that a person can do. Other times as well, but especially in the initial stages, parents have a big influence on their child and can as easily support their child’s long-term recovery as unravel it just with their words and actions, or lack of.

Studies have shown that parents do have an influence and can make a difference.

Letting our kids know when they are struggling with substances, that we are still there for them and will be waiting for them on the other side can give them the inner strength that they need to start their life anew.

Here are some ideas on things that you can say when your child is struggling with drugs or alcohol.

1. “I love you.”

While we can change these three little words up in a variety of ways, the basic “I love you” gets the message across at this critical time with no confusion.

I use every opportunity these days to add those three simple words at the end of every phone conversation and every goodbye. I don’t think any of us, no matter what our age or our situation, can hear it enough. When you going through a rough patch, you need to hear “I love you” more than ever.
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